Monday, July 12, 2010
If worrying actually caused warts I would be a wart hog
Is life complicated? I feel like it is very, very complicated most of the time. There is always so much going on around me. So much to think about and figure out and mostly to worry about. I often feel overwhelmed and want to give up, but mostly I just worry about everything some more. So maybe my life isn't so much complicated but worrisome? Not sure if I'm using that word correctly, but you get the idea. I also don't think I'm alone in this. I think its in human nature to want to be in control and when we aren't in control (which is all the time) we start to worry. Or maybe I'm just projecting?
The point of this post isn't to ramble on about my problem with worrying, so I'll get on with it and explain what God has (ever so gently) been explaining to me.
One of the things I worry about is my job (here I go again). I feel like no matter what I do, how good an employee I am, I could still be let go at any minute. There is just no stability in the company I work for, and it seems like my job depends mostly on whether my boss is feeling good today or not. This is completely out of my control, but I spend a lot of time thinking and mostly worrying about it. This is just one of many situations that I feel is on the verge of stomach ulcer status. Sad I know, but I can't help...or can I?
God has been showing me that my worries are simply a lack of trust in Him and His faithfulness. Simple truth, but when you unpack it, it has very large implications. If God is good (He certainly is) and He cares about me (which He does) then I need not worry about any situation I find myself in. Its so simple really (I need simple). I can trust God, He will give me whats best for me and He is always faithful.
So often I feel like I have to figure everything out and break it down, and it has to be completed, resolved...perfect. There is no room for imperfection, for stretching and growing and slowly being shaped by loving hands. Often I forget that the hands are there and I feel like I have to do this on my own. I guess that's the point I'm trying to make, I need to trust the hands that are guiding me. He knows, He cares and He will give me what I need in ever situation. I don't have to have it all together, only trust Him now, in this situation right now.
He is here with me, He loves me, He is good; why shouldn't I trust Him...there is hope!